-Hey Everyone-
So.. yes. It has been a week since I posted. I have been horrible. But to be honest, it's really because when I write things on my blog, I want it to be meaningful things, things that will help people and for the last few weeks, I have been beyond stressed out at work that I just haven't felt I had meaningful things to say. Work has honestly been getting the best of me lately but it's time to stop moping around and letting it effect me so I can get back into the things I love, like blogging.
So if you read my blog regularly, you would know that I have written about how I used to be an angry person and a really controlling person. God has since released me from that but sometimes, those old habits from my old self still come out.
The "do I really have to apologize? face"
Do you ever have it that sometimes you get so deep in your anger that you want to do things in spite, or say things that are meaningless and just hurtful? I will raise my hand high on that. I can get so angry sometimes that even though I know what I am doing is wrong, I still do it just because my anger has control over me. When one part of me is telling me to stop and just apologize, the other part of me wants to show the anger and prove my point (although, let's be honest, does showing anger really ever prove your point?)
I can be so stubborn that I won't apologize because the anger hardens my heart. And then, by the time I realize I took it wayyy too far and it did nothing good, I feel stupid apologizing after that. And to top it off, I feel disconnected from that person, and even God. Knowing I have sinned and let my heart be so hardened that I did/said things without purpose is hard to swallow. It is hard to explain, but apologizing and humbling yourself can just be SO hard sometimes.
I start to feel like I don't deserve forgiveness from God or that person because I was just plain foolish for getting that upset and to be completely frank, I know better than to let myself get too upset. But through growing a relationship with Christ, I know that He has already forgiven me, He just wants to help me get back on track.
The "that actually made me feel a lot better" face.
The first step to do that is repentance.
So- just last night I sat in my car and just apologized to God. I humbled myself and just spoke to Him about what I did and why I am sorry & what I need help with. It's amazing by simply saying sorry how quickly your heart un-hardens and how good it feels. It's like, I go into saying sorry feeling stupid and come out feeling refreshed. Weird? maybe. But who knew humbling yourself and showing your faults can feel so good.
After that, I knew I had to apologize to that person. So- I laid out everything I was sorry for- it didn't even matter what they did that maybe they needed to say sorry for- because like the Bible says, I needed to take the plank out of my own eye before ever trying to take the plank out of someone else's eye (Matthew 7:3). After apologizing, I felt relaxed and rested. Just confessing what I did wrong lifted the weight off my shoulders. It lifted the control I thought I needed to have, any hard feelings, and gave me the thoughts of moving forward, instead of being stuck in the moment.
It's like when you finally repent or apologize, you are cleansing all the bad, the negative and the ugly and welcoming for good to poor in where the bad was. It also helps bring God's will back into the forefront of my mind. If I can bring God the worst, then I can bring God anything I am dealing with.
I want to challenge you that if you have something you could apologize to someone for, do it! It not only makes you feel better, it makes them feel better, too. Let's put love first in line, again- one by one! :)
The "now I just want to love and kiss you" face.
"If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness."
So.. yes. It has been a week since I posted. I have been horrible. But to be honest, it's really because when I write things on my blog, I want it to be meaningful things, things that will help people and for the last few weeks, I have been beyond stressed out at work that I just haven't felt I had meaningful things to say. Work has honestly been getting the best of me lately but it's time to stop moping around and letting it effect me so I can get back into the things I love, like blogging.
So if you read my blog regularly, you would know that I have written about how I used to be an angry person and a really controlling person. God has since released me from that but sometimes, those old habits from my old self still come out.
Do you ever have it that sometimes you get so deep in your anger that you want to do things in spite, or say things that are meaningless and just hurtful? I will raise my hand high on that. I can get so angry sometimes that even though I know what I am doing is wrong, I still do it just because my anger has control over me. When one part of me is telling me to stop and just apologize, the other part of me wants to show the anger and prove my point (although, let's be honest, does showing anger really ever prove your point?)
I can be so stubborn that I won't apologize because the anger hardens my heart. And then, by the time I realize I took it wayyy too far and it did nothing good, I feel stupid apologizing after that. And to top it off, I feel disconnected from that person, and even God. Knowing I have sinned and let my heart be so hardened that I did/said things without purpose is hard to swallow. It is hard to explain, but apologizing and humbling yourself can just be SO hard sometimes.
I start to feel like I don't deserve forgiveness from God or that person because I was just plain foolish for getting that upset and to be completely frank, I know better than to let myself get too upset. But through growing a relationship with Christ, I know that He has already forgiven me, He just wants to help me get back on track.
The first step to do that is repentance.
So- just last night I sat in my car and just apologized to God. I humbled myself and just spoke to Him about what I did and why I am sorry & what I need help with. It's amazing by simply saying sorry how quickly your heart un-hardens and how good it feels. It's like, I go into saying sorry feeling stupid and come out feeling refreshed. Weird? maybe. But who knew humbling yourself and showing your faults can feel so good.
After that, I knew I had to apologize to that person. So- I laid out everything I was sorry for- it didn't even matter what they did that maybe they needed to say sorry for- because like the Bible says, I needed to take the plank out of my own eye before ever trying to take the plank out of someone else's eye (Matthew 7:3). After apologizing, I felt relaxed and rested. Just confessing what I did wrong lifted the weight off my shoulders. It lifted the control I thought I needed to have, any hard feelings, and gave me the thoughts of moving forward, instead of being stuck in the moment.
It's like when you finally repent or apologize, you are cleansing all the bad, the negative and the ugly and welcoming for good to poor in where the bad was. It also helps bring God's will back into the forefront of my mind. If I can bring God the worst, then I can bring God anything I am dealing with.
I want to challenge you that if you have something you could apologize to someone for, do it! It not only makes you feel better, it makes them feel better, too. Let's put love first in line, again- one by one! :)
"If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness."
1 John 1:9
"Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up. "
James 4:10
"Repent, then, and turn to God, so that your sins may be wiped out, that times of refreshing may come from the Lord.."
Acts 3:19
Today is
"Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up. "
James 4:10
"Repent, then, and turn to God, so that your sins may be wiped out, that times of refreshing may come from the Lord.."
Acts 3:19
Today is
Let Your Light Shine Thursdays!
Thanks so much for all of you that linked up last week!
Me and Jena loved seeing all of your posts!
Our favorite from last week's link-up was from Shannon from Shannon Nicole!
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Thanks again for all of you who participated! Now it's time to link up again :)
RULES:
1. Link up your favorite post this week - It can be related to faith, fashion, food, family, or whatever else you would like to share that helped you shine your light from the week!
Don't worry if you don't have a blog to link up - just leave a comment with how you let your light shine this week!
2. Follow I'm Perfectly Human & True Soul & Spirit on Bloglovin, or any other social media outlet (FB, Twitter, Instagram, or GFC)
3. Link back by using the button above or your own link.
4. Visit other blogs and meet new blogger friends!
Each week we will be choosing our favorite posts to feature and share with you all!
Me and Jena loved seeing all of your posts!
Our favorite from last week's link-up was from Shannon from Shannon Nicole!
She gives such wisdom and inspiration through her posts on faith, love, and life. This one here from last week was so good and uplifting.
RULES:
1. Link up your favorite post this week - It can be related to faith, fashion, food, family, or whatever else you would like to share that helped you shine your light from the week!
Don't worry if you don't have a blog to link up - just leave a comment with how you let your light shine this week!
2. Follow I'm Perfectly Human & True Soul & Spirit on Bloglovin, or any other social media outlet (FB, Twitter, Instagram, or GFC)
3. Link back by using the button above or your own link.
4. Visit other blogs and meet new blogger friends!
Each week we will be choosing our favorite posts to feature and share with you all!
Girl! I got a bit choked up reading that. My anger gets the best of me all to often and I need to let go of those things that have me bound so I can be free and closer to god. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteThanks so much for sharing this.
ReplyDelete